Peace in the Silence: Part 2- The Sequel

The Christian life is more than just attending church, it requires actively seeking to grow  in our walk with Christ

This post has the honor of being the first post specifically written as a "sequel" to a previous post. I wrote a few weeks back about the "silent" period that I feel God has me in right now. As I pointed out in that post, I am referencing the 400 years of silence between the Old and New Testament periods in which God was behind the scenes, maneuvering nations and kings for the sake of the Christ's coming. The comparison was that in my own life now, I can feel that in the stillness lately, God has been maneuvering things as well which will ultimately help to fulfill his plan as it relates to my personal walk.

Now, God is certainly personal, and I understand he isn't moving mountains for me only. But, I've had no real other way to explain the past year. It has been tough this year, but in the midst I kept feeling this desire to move closer to God (not further away as I would have expected in the midst of trial). These trials were training me to be of better service to the kingdom. My longing for theological things, and desire to learn and understand why I trust in Christ, propelled me forward like in no other year up to this point.

Now, the caveat I will place here before talking about all of the great things I anticipate for the upcoming months is that I understand this may just be the beginning, and that God is consistently and actively involved in my own life (like all those whom he calls his). I hope as well, that those whom I will reference here, understand that I am grateful to them for opportunities that have recently arisen.

This past weekend, I had decided on a particularly slow Saturday night to email my former associate pastor from Jubilee Christian center in Austin. We had moved to a new church in October 2012 to be closer to home, and to accommodate both Juliet's and my schedule. We never would have expected just how great that move would be, and how plugged in we would begin to become with Life Church in Leander. There is a special place in my heart for Jubilee, and for Pastor Jimmy and Jaquita. For the time we were there, we received what God meant for us to receive.

So, I was typing my email to our former associate pastor, and recalling all of the Thursdays after work that I used to go sit and chat theology with him. It was a great outlet for all of the studying I was doing on my own. I had helped out on a seminar with him on the topic of "Salvation," and somehow very quickly afterward lost touch. I'm not sure what the cause was, but it seemed that overnight after that seminar, I lost focus, or something just re-directed me elsewhere.

In the midst of our transition to Life Church, he was beginning to start new projects of his own. A Christian discipleship program was established, and more recently, he and his wife decided to step out on faith to plant a church in the South Austin Area. It was in this context that he reached back out to me after my email had been sent.

In truth, I can't recall what exactly propelled me to write the email, and my goal was simply to catch up with him, and maybe meet up a little bit again for our discussions. I'll post a portion of his email reply below, because when I read it and showed it to Juliet we both smiled. It is one of those moments where you just realize 100% that something is in store for you, and you have to take that jump out off the ledge to be immersed in it.

Here is what it said:

"...On that note, I am praying and looking for an anointed worship leader who can play guitar, sing and play the harmonica and be the Missions Director and lead short term trips to Mexico, write a monthly ministry/theological article for the Church newsletter, is Pug friendly and able to trouble shoot any Apple questions that arise?  Know anyone who fits that description?  I'd like to have someone who would be willing to commit to the first 2 months to get us up and going with a strong worship time.  If this is even a consideration for you, let's meet and talk about the possibilities..."


Well as this particular blurb from the email basically made mention of the ministerial things that have the most appeal to me, and hinted at my current skill set; as well as, dog breed preference, I knew I couldn't pass it up. Was this what God was preparing me for during my own "silent period?"

I talked to Pastor Matt and said I'd be more than happy to help out. As it happened, they got a location for the church booked quicker than he anticipated, and I was able to lead music at the first official meeting of Amen Austin Church this past Friday. For the next two weeks at least, I will have this same opportunity to experience the beginning stages of this church's growth.

Leading Music for First Meeting of Austin Amen church

I write this today because it seemed the perfect "sequel" to what I had written a few weeks back with no real idea where things were going to be moving. One of the best aspects of getting to help serve for the time that he feels like using me, is that it allows me to still have time for our home church. With that church, another great guy has given me the partial responsibility of organizing our next trip to Acuña in October. I can't say I'm doing a wonderful job at that just yet, but I pray God has good things in store. Juliet and I had a blessed check this pay period and were able to cover our trip costs, so we are certainly locked in and ready. She also got the time off officially now.

I think an aspect of our faith that Christians tend to forget easily is that it is an active faith. So many of us see it as that thing we do on Sundays that has no bearing on the rest of the week. Pastor Matt preached a great message on Friday about the parable of the sower. He broke down what some of the implications are for the different types of ground that the seed fell upon.

In the parable, God is sowing the seed, and the seed is God's word. When it falls, 3 of the times it lands on ground (people types) that is not sufficient for its growth. The 4th time, it falls on good soil and bears much fruit. The entire parable is found in Luke 8:4.

What occurred to me is that many times in my life to this point, I have been one of the seeds in soil that is not good. The seed which was choked with thorns is relatable when I think back upon my past. Jesus says this is the the people who hear the word, and embrace it, but the worries of life, riches or pleasures choke it out like thorns. I haven't always made time to connect with God, and often the distractions of television and daily activities can "choke out" the word.

Weeds grow without our help, but stopping them from choking us requires actively removing them

What I am learning; however, is God's desire really is to reward those who earnestly seek him (Hebrews 11:6). The funny thing is, this is a different type of a reward. It's the reward that comes from learning and growing in the faith. Its' the boldness to proclaim the gospel unabashedly. It's the hunger for God's word that until you experience cannot really be explained. It's the Scriptures making sense and the Holy Spirit opening our hearts to God's plan and meaning in this world.

The fact that I can attend a church with people I care about on Sunday and hear a good message that grows my faith, help coordinate mission trips, and challenge myself to be more of a servant is wonderful. Then, to be a part of something God is currently growing by ministering as needed at a church plant with more people that I love to be around, is just way too cool to take in all at once. The days don't interfere, so I am still able to attend home church, help with youth worship music on Wednesday nights, and now help with Austin Amen on Friday or Saturday nights makes for a great week to me. And, I still have a great job during the week that pays the bills.

God is always preparing and working in our lives. Many times, when we feel God is being most silent, he is busy working things together for the good of those who love and wish to walk with Him (Rom 8:28).  These silent periods, just as they were in the Biblical and historical sense, are blessings to us. We hold fast to the faith, knowing that if God is for us, then who can be against (Rom 8:31).

Now, all of this does come with a request to my Christian brethren. Please work diligently to not become the first type of seed which falls on rocky ground, but has no moisture with which to grow. We have all had the "altar experiences," and times of great emotion at church. The joy hits us and we get very excited about what God is doing. Then, as the week progresses, we forget that feeling. We let the thorns and weeds grow up without actively cutting them down. We get strangled by cares of the world, and forget what our focus should be. My prayer is that for my Christian brethren, and in my own life, we don't become shallow-minded Christians who have one "God experience" and then never try to grow in our faith. We must not become complacent Christians.

We should let each movement of God in our lives (whether good or bad) propel us to further growth. Juliet and I have had a tough year, but God has turned that heartache into growth and trust in Him. God did not cause the evil, but can use the bad things of this world to work things out for our good. We must be consistent, dedicated, and like the seed that fell on good ground, we must grow to bear fruit, with patient endurance. This, my friends, is the purpose we all seek. This is why I thank God today for the "silent periods" of my life.

Peace in the Silence

An often overlooked, but significant historical period is the silent period between the two testaments in the Bible. In this 400 years of silence, God is moving people and nations to a point where they will be ready to receive Christ and his plan for salvation to all men who call upon the name of the Lord. It is a period where no prophets in Israel are speaking. Ending with Malachi's book in the Old Testament we enter a 400 year silent period until John the Baptist comes on the scene as the forerunner of Jesus.

I mention this because lately, I feel I'm in the midst of my own silent period. For nearly the whole year, I've been struggling to find satisfaction in various areas of life. The primary one in which this manifested was work.

I love my job, but from about November to June, I had entered a bit of a funk. Circumstances over which I had no control took me from excelling and being a leader, to barely wanting to show up for anything but the paycheck. Most of this was self-induced.

I allowed 1 part envy, 1 part selfishness and 2 parts lack of trust in God, color my personality for nearly a year. For the most part, it affected work in a non-detrimental way. That is, I still performed my daily function and did what I had to do. Considering what a God-send this job had been in the first place it was really pretty bad of me to be frustrated and disappointed.

As this year brought multiple trials, I found it hard to focus at work. I wasn't getting enough time with Juliet, and much of my time at work was spent thinking about her, and things I had forgotten to talk to her about during the little time we were together each night.

For weekends, I had plenty of time, but during work days, I slept too much. For most days, I would average 10 hours or more, when really 6-8 would have sufficed. I would leave home dreading the night at work. And, it wasn't even busy at work. Maybe that is why I had all the time to think, and dwell on things that I was unhappy about.

So, in July for our 6th anniversary, we made a trip to Oklahoma to visit my family. My stepmom suggested that I try to get a more concise, regulated sleep schedule. This would allow me my 6-8 hour daily, but also free up 4 hours a night with Juliet to interact. Now instead of about 12 hours a week together, we'd average closer to 40.

We came back and I immediately implemented the new sleep schedule to great effect. Though Juliet's schedule conflicted sometimes, I managed to stick very close to my 9a-5p sleep. At work, I began to enjoy my time again because I was rested, and had plenty of interaction at home with Juliet.

For August, I had one of my more productive months thus far. I credit it to the change in sleep and spouse interaction.

So, what does this have to do with a silent period?

Well, in the midst of my disappointments from the November- June period, one of my Christian brothers at work was excelling at the job. He began steadily climbing the ranks without really seeming to seek it out. We had spoken a lot about our faith, and he seemed to have much more trust in God's plan than I did. He just prayed, read the word daily and focused on his job while he was here.

He wasn't sullen over missed opportunities, or envious of those around him. He just buckled down and did what was required. He lived out Colossians 3:23 and Ephesians 6:7.

Now, I look at the current situation, and he has been blessed with even more responsibility. It's great because we get along well at work and really build each other up in Christian brotherly love. He learns from me, and I learn from him. And, in this instance, I am truly excited for him and what God is doing in his life.

So, the other night as I sat back reflecting on the upward trend my work life and personal life is taking after a big slump, I realized that I am in the midst of a silent period.

God is moving in my life behind the scenes setting up something that I can only imagine is magnificent. There is this urge deep within me to study theological matters and equip myself with information about what I believe. In the midst of that, I also have a strong pull to get out and do more good for people. I feel like letting my light shine by action so that my faith will shine as well.

If God had placed me where I wanted to be back in November, I don't really think I would have been ready. Even now,  I can see I have many personal things to learn and grow with before being responsible over others. In the midst of my buddy's promotion of sorts, I can see God working things together for my good  as well (Rom 8:28).

So, just as Israel likely contemplated what was to come during the 400 years of God's silence, I too contemplate the blessings and growth that awaits. I have no idea what is happening behind the scenes, but I know things are working. I am trying to pray daily now for a spirit of humility. I pray to be rid of my spirit of selfishness and envy. I want to humble myself at work and at home to be the best I can be, so that when God says, "go!" I will be ready and able.

So, in this blessed silence, God and I have grown closer. They say the closer you grow to God the more aware of your failings you become. This sounds bad at first, but is really a blessed truth. By realizing my failings and shortcomings, I can learn to rely better on God. I can put my trust where it should be placed, instead of in man or myself.

There's an old Christian song we used to sing in church that said something like this:

So I wait for you, So I wait for you
I'm falling on my knees, offering all of me
Jesus you're all this heart is living for.

I think sometimes Tom Petty is right about "the Waiting" being the hardest part, but I know God is busy moving me into a position in life where I can be of best use to the kingdom. People and nations are moving for the good of those who love and trust in him. And, for now, I find peace in that silence.